A "new" place we discovered right in our back door.  Lichtenstein Palace.

Every year the natural rhythm of life picks back up when school starts.  Routine.  Normalcy.  Alarms.  Agendas.  Lists.  Schedules.  It all works together and a new rhythm of another chapter establishes a new beat.

Something about celebrating a 47th birthday and sending my "baby" off to middle-school makes me "measure my days" a little.  I really like the routine, normal, alarms, agendas, lists and schedules.  But somehow those things that keep life somewhat predictable are making me bored.

I'm feeling the urge to do something new, try a new thing, branch out, spread my wings ... free fall.  Ok, nothing as dramatic as a convertible sports car and spandex, but maybe, just maybe ... a little something ... new.

This year, my traditional "It's my birthday and I can do what I want to do" ... which always means I take the day to do something by myself ... got ousted for a night out on the town with friends.  I'm feeling the urge to take a photo a day ... and blog something about it.  Who knows?  I may even add highlights to my hair!

I really don't believe this is a mid-life crisis.  I think it's a "standing up and taking stock of the brevity of life" crisis.  I do routine really well.  It's time to shake it up a bit ...

drinking coffee from a new mug,
christina

The weekend of August 14 I took a personal retreat. My plan was open-ended. I just wanted to be away, by myself, and have God show up in a fresh, new way.

I’ve been on a journey with Jesus since I was 19 years old. (I just turned 43 so you do the math. I’ve gone through stages during these years. Some stages were about me falling in love with this Savior stranger. Some stages were me seeing the power spoken and written in his letters to me through the Bible. Some stages were silence – and me doubting his love. Some stages were brass bands marching through my soul – and me confidently knowing who He is.

Through every stage, there was always a lesson. And, with every lesson, there was a deeper understanding of this God I couldn’t contain in a box.

My weekend proved to be another revelation of who He is … and is not. For just a few hours, on the terrace of an upscale hotel in Budapest, I met God again. It wasn’t like our daily encounters. It was more like a brunch – on a lazy Saturday morning – with an easy agenda.

During the course of our lazy morning, I heard him speak softly about matters close to my heart … and felt the quite confidence that all was in His hands. I heard him speak softly about who I am … and am not. But most of all, I just heard … Him.

I was most astounded by the quietness of my soul among the morning activity that surrounded me. The biggest miracle I witnesses on that lazy Saturday was a fresh encounter of the living God, speaking directly to my heart. My smile was automatic. My tears that glided down my mineral powder make-up cheeks were authentic testimonies and acts of worship to a loving God. To the unconscious by passer, I sipped my deaf coffee and soaked in the warmth of the sun. Sure I sat in my deck chair. But in my spirit I was somewhere else … somewhere holy and inhabited by the presence of Almighty God.

It still astounds me … this God. He knows everything about me … and yet the longer I seem to know Him, the more I discover and uncover and unveil. His ways they are mysterious. His love toward me is always fresh.

My journey continues,
Christina

Over the years that we’ve been married, Chris and I have learned a lot. We’ve learned how to really love each other. We’ve learned how to love God together. We’ve learned that children changed us. We’ve learned that jobs sometimes fail us. We’ve learned that timing is everything. We’ve learned that what we want and what we need are two different things.

About 9 years ago, Chris and I decided that if we said we trusted God with our lives, then perhaps we should put our money where our mouth is and truly trust Him with every part of our lives. We felt God’s gentle tug asking us to give up the one area of our lives that we felt like we had “control” over … childbearing. We had 2 children. We felt we had “planned” the right time to start and then add to our family. However, after a series of events and perspective changes, we wondered who really was “control” of giving us children.

With deep fear and trepidation, we said these words to God: “If you want us to have more children (gulp) then we give that part of our lives over to you. It’s in your hands.”

Months went by. More months went by. I was convinced that God gave us our answer and told us no more kiddos were in our future. After all, I was fast approaching 35 and Chris … well; we all know he’s older than I am so … I figured our baby days were over. And, thank God they were! No more middle of the night feedings. No more diapers, potty training and terrible two’s. It was over.

After a few more months had gone by – Shazzam! It happened. The only other time a certain part of my female anatomy began to get sore … and I have two of them … were the times I was pregnant.

Nine months later, I was in a delivery room birthing out a 9 pound 1 ounce, uni-brow, baby girl, named Libby. We didn’t know what we were in for.

Like I said earlier, I’m so glad God gives us what we need and not what we want. I did not want another child. However, I needed one … and I needed the one God gave us.

Libby is Red Bull in a princess dress. She is assertive, direct and speaks her mind. Right now, one of her favorite phrases is: “I don’t mean to offend … but ….” (and I always hold my breath after the “but” because I know it may not be pretty.

For being the youngest child, she stands her ground, tries to get her way, and doesn’t back down from a challenge. She forgets to obey, brush her teeth and tell me when she goes outside to play.

But … and there is always a but … this Red Bull princess has stolen my heart. From the very beginning, her arrival marked a new phase of my life. Changing hormones and chemicals wretched havoc with my anxiety yet God used all of it to push me into true healing. I’d like to say that had Libby not crashed my world, I may not have experienced total emotional healing.

I love this Libby. I just love her. I love her spunk, glamour, how she walks in high heels, how she wears glitter headbands, how she sounds when she speaks German, how she holds her pencil when she does Math, her dark brown hair, and the way she kisses me goodnight and giggles when I pretend we are glued together.

Now, when Addison reads this she is gonna be smart and say now Libby is my favorite daughter, just like she did when I wrote my Ode to Parker. Truth is … Libby is my favorite … yet so is Parker … and so is Addison.

Happy Birthday, Libby!

I am allowing my birthday to slip through my hands.

I arrived home this morning from Budapest, Hungary with 3 sweet baby girls and my Chris waiting to celebrate my day. My day was ushered in by a waterfall of balloons being poured down on me from the top of the stairwell.

I was then brought to the table that was set for a traditional Austrian breakfast, gifts surrounding my plate, and red roses decorating the center of the table. As we lathered our rolls with butter and jelly, I unfolded the events of my weekend get-a-way.

I promptly headed upstairs for a movie in bed ... in which I fell asleep ... for several hours.

I know am in the process of eating a piece of homemade chocolate cake and settling in for another movie.

I pushed aside the self-imposed agenda of trying to do something or go somewhere to make my day "special" and rested in the fact that being with those I love the very most in the world, doing pretty much nothing at all ... is making this day what it should be ... perfect!

I loved being loved on ... and feel grateful for this special day!

We Elledge's have spent the last 7 days in our home, hibernating. We are officially calling this "vacation". To get 5 people on the same page, all wanting to merely stay indoors, watch movies, take naps, and basically do nothing is nothing short of a miracle! Yet, that is precisely what we have done!

The most complicated thing we've pursued while being in hibernation has been to coordinate our meals with the movie of the night. For example, we had beans,potatoes and cornbread on the night we watched "Oklahoma". We had Asian food on the night we watched "Anna and the King". And, on the night we watched "Anne of Greene Gables" we had chicken pot pie. Not really sure why this dish, but Addison said it fit!

Yesterday, my birthday (still time to send belated greetings, cards, gifts, boxes, gift certificates, money orders, etc.)was the first day we ventured out of the house. My cute and creative family, prompted by only a few thousand hints from me, gave me a birthday certificate book. Included in this book were certificates for little treasures that made me happy: a trip to the ice cream shop, getting some garden stuff, some new pens, a pedicure, and a bracelet from my favorite Kiosk in the mall. The day was topped off by Addison preparing me an authentic Austrian meal of schnitzel, pommes frits, salat, and an IKEA Torte (tasted like a frozen Almond Joy bar). Trying to live up to my self-imposed image of Mary Poppins, "practically perfect in every way", I gave my girls a little gift of my own. We pulled off the girls mattress from their beds, dragged them into the living room floor and had an all-girls sleep over party, while falling asleep to an Elvis movie "Spin Out". It was a perfectly cozy day and one I shall remember when I'm older and grayer!

Because of our recent hibernation status, our brains have been on idle as well. The only other thing to report on this week is our recent discovery of how to buy water hoses Austrian style. We discovered this while I was using my garden coupon yesterday. Note the picture. Apparently, water hoses are purchased without the ends to them. Those come extra. You can buy a kit or you can buy hosing by the meter, pick out the end of your choice, and have a self-designed water hose.

I told you, it was a slow news week. Perhaps this next week will be more exciting as we clamour about trying to get ready for the start of a new school year. We are in mourning as this is the first year in who knows how long we won't be going shopping with DaBaw (the girls Grandma in Oklahoma). No, we go it alone this year. With fear and trembling I take 3 girls who need pants and school supplies out by myself without the backup of a middle-aged woman who can use her shopping prowess to maneuver in and out of Kohl's like a stealth predator, finding the best deals, biggest coupon savings, and the best place to get a diet coke in the process! It's a big job, filling the shoes of such a shopping icon. I only hope her force will be with us. Perhaps God will smile at my attempts and part the sale waters and give us everything we need at the first store. He is the God of the impossible!!

Until next week,
Christina