I recently went into a dressing room. I wasn't trying on clothes, just waiting for my daughter. As I was standing there, I couldn't help but overhear another Mother/Daughter combo. It was apparent that the daughter was graduating from high school. Mom was looking for a dress. Mom didn't want to look like a "Mom" but wanted something new to commemorate the day.
It was just last year that this duo could have been me and my Addie. Oh the emotions that sat at the surface of our throats as we approached graduation. Now, it's just a sweet memory. We passed that milestone. We are on to different things.
This process of feeling the hit of a blow (good or bad) before the actual event is normal, natural and felt by all mankind. We have an image, perception, intuition about how the scene is going to play out. We anticipate it. We dread/look forward to it ... and maybe both! We rehearse our part. And ... big long pause ... wait for it ... wait for it ... it's over.
Done.
Then it's on to the next thing.
Sounds so simplistic on this end of it. Not so much of a big deal. However, when you are the one living it ... it's a BIG DEAL!
Perspective is everything. Learning to walk through the big deal kinds of stuff is a life-long process. Learning to take the emotion as it comes, talk about it if you need to and be in the moment takes practice.
Even as I type, graduation seems like no big deal ... now. Now, I have other big deals to anticipate.
learning,
christina
Well, she
did it. She walked right across that big
ol’ stage, accepted her high school diploma, and has officially turned the page
of a new chapter. I sat in the audience
as a spectator. It wasn’t about me. It was all about her.
My friend
has a sweet baby girl; baby Ava is what we affectionately call her. They came to visit us last weekend and to
celebrate Addison’s graduation a little early with us at a party we held in our
home.
As my
friend changed her daughters diapers, breast-fed, and soothed her sweet baby
Ava … I watched my daughter mingle about with her friends, teachers, and adult
supporters. As my friend passed her
sweet daughter around for others to hold, coddle and snuggle with … I watched
as my daughter worked the room as an adult woman, offering and receiving words
of encouragement and hope.
As my
friend is fully learning to embrace being a first-time Mom … I am learning how
to embrace being a Mom to an adult child.
My friend has to learn to hold tight and invest deeply. I am learning how to let go and trust in the
investment I’ve made. Bittersweet.
During the
ceremony, as I comforted my sweet Parker who could no longer keep her tears
inside her heart, saw the occasional crocodile tears slip down my sweet Chris’
cheek, and saw Libby shoot Addison the “I love you” sign with her fingers
whenever she could catch Addison’s attention … I was OK. We had all made it. We arrived at the place we needed to
land. We landed with tears … but we were
all OK.
Life lesson
#1 in letting your child go … land well.
You will land with tears but you will land. The tears help soften the landing. I have no regrets.
Every time I
locked eyes with my Addison during the ceremony… knowing her thoughts … and
having her know mine … affirmed the
journey ahead. This new chapter has
begun. Woman to woman we enter into the
next thing … the next leg of this journey.
We have no idea what’s written on the next page. However, faith and experience has taught us
good principles. We just walk. We put one foot in front of the other and
just walk. You can’t get to the end of
the next chapter by standing still. We
walk.
And so …
let the new adventure begin!
