Letters from Home

This week we got a letter from home. Aunt Peggy is actually Chris' Aunt, but because she loves me well I consider her my Aunt as well! Aunt Peggy makes chocolate gravy and biscuits, dresses like a hip 35 year old (even though she is ... well, some things are better left a secret!), and can make the most mundane story a masterpiece in literature. By definition, she is a true southern woman.

Upon receiving her letter, my thoughts hadn't turned toward home ... at least not to her home specifically. However, the minute I read her words, my mind drifted from my Austrian, urban setting to the dusty roads of her small town in Oklahoma. I found myself longing to sit at her kitchen table, watch her wrangle up something to eat and listen to her retell the latest news about a member of her community.

What I find particularly interesting about my longing is this fact: I did the same thing when I was in Oklahoma! My mind would drift toward Austria many times, waiting to make this my new home. And, now that I'm here, I look back at what was so ordinary and wish it into existence! How fickle my heart can be!

Last week, we had the opportunity to attend a meeting with several comrades from our company. One morning we had a chance to just hibernate somewhere, be still, and hear from God. I ran across this little jewel in Psalm 90:1 "Lord, through all the generations you have been our home." Not especially a power punch, but the Lord very gently whispered this truth to my heart ... Where I am is your home. Makes life pretty simple. Wherever God puts me, leads me, asks me to go ... that is my home.

As Addison looks toward the next three years and is already starting to dream about universities to attend, I remain in denial. There - I said it. I'm not ready to think about my little girl leaving home, doing life separate from me, and getting emails from her updating me on her life. However, if I put any kind of action to my faith in a real God, I have to also believe the power of His words: Where He is ... is also Addison's home. Wherever God puts her, leads her, asks her to go ... even if away from home, that is her home.

That's when I sat down and cried, blew my nose, and realized that life is always a look forward and a look behind. And if I could learn the power of being still in the presence of my God and wait patiently for him ... I would realize that in the looking forward and the looking behind, He is and was there.

I hope Aunt Peggy will forgive me as I say I am content with not having chocolate gravy and biscuts ... because that is not where God has put me. I am content, to roam the streets of my Wien, drinking wonderful coffee and surfing the net for future universities with Addison. I'm gonna be still - even if it kills me - and rest in simple truth: Where He is - it's home!

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