Flight Plans

We are the Queens of Self"ies"!!

My oldest is preparing for flight.  Friends have inquired about my heart.  It's always the build up that is worse than the actual event.  Right now, I try not to live in the build up ... just live in the right now.

This first-born, leader type of mine occupies a lot of my thoughts.  When she is sick, I think about who will care for her when she's sick in the future.  When she calls me and asks me to meet her for coffee, I think about how long it will be ... and how far away I'll be ... to drop everything and share some Java with my girl.

I know this child.  I know her heart.  I know that in her innermost being, she has made a commitment to follow this Jesus ... just as I have.

When the tears come ... from projecting way too far in the future ... I cling to a promise.  Jesus said that He was gonna go and prepare a place for me.  This place is for me ... and for my Addie ... and for others who have made a commitment to follow Him.  When life is over as we know it ... that's where we will be.

I don't find myself longing for heaven.  I don't know how I feel about that ... if I should ... if I should be worried that I don't.  What I do long for ... is no more pain ... no more tears.  I do long for a day where living with no more goodbyes will be a reality.