When someone tells me to "be quiet", "be myself", "be assertive" or "be respectful" ... I kinda raise my back feathers and want to rebel.  Just being honest.  What I first conclude is that they think I am not exuding the qualities they are asking me to display.  If they (and who in the sam hill is "they"?) tell me to be quiet, apparently I am not being ... or acting ... quiet.  Again, laying all Sunday school answers at the door and being brutally honest, I want to clear my throat loudly, stomp my foot, and whisper loud at their request to be quiet.  Quiet, in fact, becomes the last thing on my mind.  Loud.  Loud is what I want to be ... and act out ... and develop.

So when I read in 1 Thessalonians 4 what Paul writes to his friends, I cringe.  Yikes.  Paul is someone I admire, respect and consider worthy of taking advice from.  He says to them ... "be holy".  I gotta ponder that a moment, for I, the keeper of a rebellious heart, have some questions.

I am a Mom.  I love my three, precious, beautiful, smart, witty, brilliant, strong, soft, assertive, justice-seeking, single-minded, merciful daughters.  When I look at them, I don't see what's wrong with them ... for could there be any fault in such beauties?  Yes.  Yes there are faults, but not ones I want to rub in their faces and mock.  Their faults are things (characteristics/tendencies) that I see I have struggled with and want to bring into the light and encourage them to develop to make strong.  I don't want them to keep these faults hidden and neglect them and wish them to disappear.  Hiding only highlights the defect.  Exposing brings into a place of sweet revelation and healing.

So when Paul tells his friends to "be holy", I have to suppose he desires for them to take into account their current behavior in light of an alternate behavior that will bring them good, make them healthy, lead to a better way of living.

But is it behavior he is after?  As a Mom, I want a certain behavior, but not at the expense of my girls leaving their heart at the door and only feigning actions without strong conviction behind those actions.

When they say they love their friends, I don't want them to merely act like they love their friends.  I want them to love them from a heart level.  I want them to care for, pray for, devote themselves to, invest in, cry with, laugh with, stay awake for and be deeply committed to their friend.

I want their heart first.  Actions leap from the deep places in the heart.

And therefore I've answered my own questions about what Paul was saying to his friends:  be holy.  Don't act holy.  Don't put on a show.  Don't give lip service to.  Don't attend certain gatherings because.  Don't abstain from things or engage in things because.  Just be holy.  At a heart level, making a commitment to be holy, will ooze out into all areas of my life.  I will act holy if in my core and in the beating of my heart is the decision to be holy.

And then, kind of as a "kicker" to the whole equation, Paul says this after his request.  First, he tells them to be holy.  Then, he says that because God is so faithful, He will make it happen.  It isn't enough that we make a commitment to be holy.  No, God comes in and then says "I will do this for you, you sweet girl, because I see your heart and I am the One who will transform you."

Wow.

In a recent conversation with a dear friend who is a young Mother, I made this statement:  "Are you after behavior modification of a heart change?"  The same principle applies here ... be holy.  It's a statement about the condition of our core being.  The behavior springs from this place.  And if there's a good core, there will be good actions.

Being holy,
Christina

P.S.  Holy doesn't mean perfect ... and that's another story ...